“may love find you. even. when you are specifically. strategically. hiding from it.” Nayyirah Wahid
She liked my quote about finding love again.
I liked her post about her recent trip.
The exchange of heart-shaped likes filled our Instagram pages.
This was the beginning of a modern romance.
She was on a mission to travel the world and said she was an independent woman.
She also had 10,000 followers on Instagram!
never had had hundreds of Instagram crushes.
Well, I’ve had plenty of Instagram crushes but I’ve never actually engaged with an Instagram crush.
What was so intoxicating here was not only was she beautiful and from the homeland but she was spiritual and loved helping people.
A match made in Instagram heaven.
We exchanged messages and continued to become each other’s Insta fans until I decided it was time to share my feelings for her.
How do you tell someone you like them?
Normal people, “Hey, you’re cool and we should talk more to see if we have more in common?”
“Hey, the universe has parted ways, the divine has awakened and destiny has called upon me to initiate this conversation. We have known each other for life times and we must speak to discuss our future marriage, where will live and how many kids we will have together.”
This is a fantastic first message, if I do say so myself.
Also, a good way to never hear from her again.
I turned the woman I thought I had been waiting a lifetime for into a woman I would never hear from again.
The love of my life had gone silent on Instagram.
We were both on the Titanic when she just pushed me off the ship into the stormy waters to find myself, to fall into an emotional thunderstorm and to frantically search for a rescue boat.
Now, what’s the moral of this story?
Well, first, don’t fall for Instagram influencers on the internet.
(Oh random – have we connected on Instagram? Let’s connect on Instagram here – you could be the next internet crush I fall in love with)
But here’s the bigger point here.
We rise in love and we fall in love.
This mini modern romance was not of much consequence. It was likely a romance in my mind than in reality. Maybe she didn’t even think twice about me before I sent her an essay professing my love to her.
Yet those real romances that we have gone through in our lives and have fallen hard in are like those violent thunderstorms that took down the Titanic.
When a relationship or the marriage hits the sea floor, you’re likely dead. Or if alive, bruised, battered and can’t breathe by the time you get your head above water.
You don’t need a reinvention.
You need a resuscitation.
You don’t need a recovery.
You need a revival.
The worst breakups take us down and put us out for the count.
You will never feel like getting into the boxing ring of life again after one knockout.
You will never feel like dating again after one hard-fought, knock-down, dragged down breakup.
Please dear God never torment me and try to kill me like this again.
Yet, I am here with a message for you on why you need to get the heck up and give love another try.
No matter how much you were hurt and no matter how badly the other person did you wrong, I want you to know that it is worth giving love another shot.
As much as you have suffered in love, fell in love, drowned in love, knocked down in love, died in love, be willing to give love another chance.
The love that you desire is waiting for you on the other side of the love that destroyed you.
Your job is to heal the wound, forgive the past, rebuild your self-worth, find yourself and show up for love again because love is worth it.
Love will help you become the person that you were meant to be.
Love will help you expand and grow as a person.
Love will help bring you connection, joy, affection and intimacy.
Love will help break down your barriers of what you believe to be possible and break down the walls that are keeping you from fully experiencing life.
Even if love doesn’t show up, keep going in love because I am convinced that the journey to love is the path to love. You are not going to get to the final destination in love until you go through all the stops along the way.
Keep moving forward in love, keep falling down in love, keep getting up in love.
A broken heart is an open heart.
Falling down is an opportunity to rise up.
What’s possible is out there if you can stay focused on the path and stay open to the possibilities.
You and I are on a love journey.
If you haven’t even started, start.
If you haven’t considered the possibility yet, be open to it.
Don’t swear off love because that one cosmic relationship you were in devastated you.
If you don’t know where to start, reach out to me for some support in this process. I’m going to be unveiling some coaching options soon that will help you on this journey to overcoming heartbreak.
In the meantime, check out this book that I wrote. It’s a good first step to finding love, Does True Love Exist? The short answer is yes but love requires your participation.