Do you think the universe is out to thump you like the 2014 German World Cup team? (Yup, beat you 7-1 on your own turf, in your own country? ¡Que triste Brasil!)
Or do you believe the universe is like a well-dressed, chiseled-jaw, Italian gentleman with piercing blue eyes who discreetly whispers, “Ti adoro” (I adore you) into your ears as the clock strikes midnight?
One who listens intently to your every command and often grants your wishes?
Or, more likely, do you think that anyone who speaks about such things as “the universe” should be locked up in a far-away island-ashram with organic cuisine and non-stop audio recordings of Deepak Chopra?
The universe and you.
Each of us will characterize the universe as something different.
To some, the universe is the physical realm we live in.
Most correlate the universe with the natural order of the world we live in, even Mother Nature.
You may think of the universe in a spiritual realm, like a universal design or intelligence by a higher power.
Even God.
The universe can be your reality. The world as you see it.
How to have the universe on your side.
I’ve noticed in my own life that the more I’m tune with the universe and its laws, the more positive circumstances unfold in my favor and life feels like it’s rooting for me.
Other times, when I’ve been out of sorts with the universe, I feel like a floating feather in the eye of a hurricane, stirred violently in its arms.
When you’re in tune, the universe grants you favors like the Godfather.
In my own life, being in sync with the universe these days has resulted in a dream job, meeting the right people, rich experiences, exotic travel and circumstances falling into place.
Even without asking for things, living by these universal principles makes miracles happen. It feels like magic at times!
Out of tune, the universe will feel like well-dressed, burly men in black, driving you out into the desert in the middle of the night with shovels in the trunk.
If you’re having trouble getting what you want in life, feeling out of sync with the universe and not manifesting your dreams, you may be in the dark about some powerful universal laws.
It’s not that you suck at manifesting – you just didn’t know about these universal laws existed. And if you had no idea these laws existed, you probably don’t know how you could live in alignment with them.
But all that is about to change now.
These are not laws I created, but simply discovered working in my life.
I find that when I’m in alignment with these 21 laws, miracles occur and dreams come true.
These 21 laws have helped me be one with the universe and have created some delightful circumstances in my life. I am writing these laws down to help you achieve your dreams and manifest your life desires.
21 Powerful Laws to Be One with the Universe and Manifest Your Every Wish
1. Be present. Our desire is often to live in the past and in the future. Living in the past allows you to lick your wounds and immerse yourself in your pain. Living in the future elevates your anxiety and causes you to measure yourself against a future that is not yet here.
The universe works best with you when you live in the present time. Refuse to be hauled back to the past or constantly thinking of and fearing your future.
Whenever you become aware that you’re dreaming about that sweet relationship from 20 years ago or that ex who did you wrong, take note of it. Recognize that you’re drifting into the past.
Live here, now, by simply noticing when you drift away to the past or future.
2. Be prayerful. Although this may be a religious concept to most, I don’t necessarily mean this in a religious sense. Sure, I may pray to a God, but a prayer of thanksgiving, a prayer for strength to deal with life’s twists and turns, or a prayer of hope will do just as well.
Prayer allows for focused reflection and alignment of our soul with the universe.
Prayer is a practice that allows your heart to communicate directly with the universe.
Speak to the universe through prayer, but refrain from groveling or begging. Instead, use these tips to pray the right way.
3. Be still. This is an important one. Somehow when I’m still through a period of either silence or meditation, I am able to cut out the world around me and be on the exact same vibration as the universe.
“Day by day, become more and more intimate with the inner stillness, joy and love which is the fragrance of your own pure heart. Keep quiet.” Mooji
Be still. Meditate. Listen to yourself. Allow moments of silence so your intuition or soul will reveal answers to you.
5. Live like you’ve received it. Imagine how it would feel to have what you desire or request from the universe.
Use visualization techniques to feel and embrace what you desire.
I mentioned above that you shouldn’t live in the future or waste your time in any place other than the present moment. So how do you reconcile the two concepts?
Simply live today like you already have what you want.Feel those feelings and vibrations like you have your heart’s desire at this very moment.
Imagine that it was you whom George Clooney had proposed to, instead of Amal Alamuddin.
Like you bought Ellen Degeneres’s house.
Scored the world cup goal, instead of Mario Goetze of Germany.
Jubilantly walked away with Clare Danes’s or Julia Louis-Dreyfus’s Emmy award.
6. Be of service. Look for opportunities to help others and improve their lives.
“If you’re feeling helpless, help someone.” Aung San Suu Ky
The universe is both disciplined and reciprocal about your service to others. The more you serve freely and without expectations, the more the universe will serve you in your life.
If you serve with expectations, be prepared to face disappointments instead.
Try to help one person each day. Improve someone’s life in some small way.
Serve with your time, your talents, give your abilities to improve the lives of others.
Give more than you take. Give when you aren’t asked.
7. Celebrate everyone’s gift. This is another biggie. As humans, we always are thinking of how to gain for ourselves.
The universe simply HATES this kind of thinking.
If you’re only worried about receiving for yourself, the universe sees this as selfish and self-indulgent.
The universe isn’t a doting parent favoring only one child. And the universe isn’t like The Bachelor reality show where only one lucky woman walks away with the man of her dreams.
The universe isn’t a lottery where there’s only one winner. Everyone wins.
If you think you’re losing, if you try to compare yourself to others or feel resentment at the success of others, the universe will flip you off like a rushed commuter on the I-405.
Whatever anyone receives, celebrate it. My gift is your gift. Your mother-in-law’s success is your success. Your neighbor’s job promotion is your job promotion.
Your best friend’s Oscar win is your Oscar win.
Change your mindset from win-lose to win-win. When you win, I win. We all win.
Celebrate others as you would celebrate yourself.
8. Give a hoot about others. Pay attention to what’s around you. Be more observant of your world.
Look for injustice, poverty, or inequality, and help do something about it.
Make a difference by caring. Change the world by alleviating the pain or problem.
Don’t look at a situation and say, “That’s not my problem”. Instead, think about what you can do to help that problem. What solutions can you come up with?
How can you help? Who should you inform?
Exercise your empathy at work and in life. Try to understand the circumstances others are in and the burdens they face.
Putting yourself in other people’s shoes opens up pores of compassion and love toward others and yourself.
The universe uses compassion and love as fertilizer to allow your life to bloom.
9. Give thanks. Be forever grateful for what the universe has brought your way.
The more thankful you are, the more goodness the universe delivers to you.
The secret here is to be grateful for even the smallest things.
And even for things that you have no business being grateful for. While you may want to curl up in bed over a breakup, know that it could be a big step towards a better future.
When sick, be thankful that you’re having time off to rest.
When you have to shut down a business, be thankful that you don’t have to invest any more money.
When a loved one passes away, be thankful for all the time you were able to spend with them.
10. Be love. Embrace, cultivate and radiate love towards others.
Love your partner. And everyone else too.
Look for every opportunity to reflect love back at the world.
In the face of hatred, injustice and pain, respond with love.
If you’ve grown up without love or lacking love for yourself, then focus on building up your own self-worth and self-love. Read the manifesto on self-love here.
Love yourself as the universe wants to love you. You can only receive universal love when you have the ability to receive love yourself.
So, practice loving yourself, practice loving others, and practice loving everything.
Be a transmitter of love so the universe can work through you and manifest whatever it is your heart imagined.
11. Forgive. Forgive anyone and everyone who has trespassed against you. Use radical forgiveness to let go of the deepest pains and injuries.
The universe can only bring you love when the wounds of pain and anger have healed. You must forgive to allow healing and love to envelop your life.
If you’re not getting what you want out of life, there are probably people in your life you’ve not forgiven. You must let go and forgive them, no matter how big the trespass was.
If you don’t forgive, the universe can’t do its work to bring you what you deserve. The universe will be caught up in your blocks and your resentments.
Universal energy cannot flow through you because you’ve stopped it with pettiness, bitterness and building a wall of negative vibrations around yourself.
If you can’t forgive in your heart, start by writing a letter of forgiveness to the person who has done you wrong.
12. Let go. Let go of what’s holding you down. Let go of emotional turmoil, grudges and hurt. Let go of the past. Let go of pleasurable and painful experiences.
The universe does not like greedy people, and that’s exactly what you’re doing when you hold onto things.
When you hold onto uncomfortable or pleasurable experiences, the universe sees you hoarding something, clinging to feelings like you are to your favorite blanket.
But when you’re holding on so deeply to these feelings, you again stop the universal energy from flowing
“Most of our troubles are due to our passionate desire for and attachment to things that we misapprehend as enduring entities,” the Dalai Lama has said.
If you can’t let go of fleeting feelings and circumstances, how can the universe grant you better and richer experiences? If you’re hoarding the negative vibes (or even positive ones), how can the universe trust you with new experiences?
Embrace the experiences you face, but do not sit on the treasure of your experiences like a selfish Wall Street baron.
Say this: “I chose to let go of this experience” or “I chose to free myself from these feelings. I will allows these feelings to pass through me like the clouds in the sky.”
In fact, be like the sky. Allow feelings, experiences and desires to float past you without grabbing onto them.
The sky is endless. The clouds are abundant.
13. Trust. Trust that the universe will manifest what is right for you, not necessarily what you’ve asked for.
I used to make specific desires and request of the universe, but those manifestations have brought forth pain and struggle at times.
Instead, I now reveal my intentions to the universe, but do not demand how it goes about it or insist on a particular result.
The result I desire may not be right for me.
Trust the universe to use its infinite wisdom to deliver what is best for you.
Instead of demanding that you become the top cat at your company, ask the universe for a position that allows you to manage and lead others.
Instead of demanding a fancy home on the beach, ask the universe for a residence that makes you feel abundant and gives you joy.
Instead of the perfect man, ask for unconditional love, respect and someone who will empower you. Be open to whoever shows up.
14. Be open. Don’t think the universe won’t deliver. Be open to receiving what the universe has in store for you.
It may not be exactly as you desire it, but simply give the universe time to deliver at the right time for you.
And be open to the various manifestations of your intention. Again, it may not be exactly as you had wished, but it will be what is right for you.
Also, we’re curious people. When things do show up in our lives, even if it’s exactly what we wanted, we run scared.
We make up stories in our mind about why someone is not right for us. Even if our deepest heart’s desire shows up, we worry that it will go away, it isn’t right for us, it will end.
Whenever your heart feels like closing, open it. When it feels like running away, stay. Be present.
Know that whatever experience you’re having is the experience you need. It is the experience you need for the evolution of your consciousness, as Eckhart Tolle has declared.
15. Follow the universe’s lead.
The universe will point and lead in certain directions.
Instead of fighting it, go with the flow.
The path of least resistance is the one the universe wants.
If you find yourself in a treacherous path in the pitch-black jungle, fear not. Once again, trust the universe, knowing that there will always be dawn after darkness.
After struggling against and overcoming obstacles in your path, you will see the light.
The universe will guide you in certain directions. Certain paths and people will show up from nowhere. Know that these are signs and clues from the universe.
16. Pay attention to clues. The universe will tell you what’s right with subtle and overwhelming messages.
The universe will speak to you through your intuition, but you may also receive guidance from a single conversation, a book, a phrase or even a seemingly random road sign or car license plate.
In order to be able to see the clues the universe regularly reveals to you, be more mindful to the sights and sounds around you.
If you’re not actively looking for clues from the universe, you’ll miss them.
If you’re trying to make a decision and 3 people give you unsolicited advice about the issue, it’s most likely a clue.
If you go to pick up a cream color cotton-cardigan by Bottega Veneta at the mall but discover it’s sold out, it could be a sign. If you see the same cream-color cardigan at the Banana Republic for one-tenth of the price, even more of a sign. If it’s an extra 20% off due to it being Valentine’s Day weekend, the universe is demanding that you pick it up.
17. Make space. Start clearing out dead-weight thoughts, emotional baggage and other hurts and pains. Once you let go of a person, a feeling, or unproductive habits, you’ll have additional room for more positive people and circumstances in your life.
Leave toxic jobs, situations and even people so you have some breathing room.
The universe can only bring you something different if have room in your life for it.
Most importantly, make space with your time. If you fill every minute of every waking hour with something to do and people to see, how are you going to answer the universe’s appointments and messengers? And messages?
When can your soul mate find you when you’re working 18 hours a day and taking classes at night?
Free up your time. Free up your life. Reduce your commitments. Slow down.
Make space in your life so the universe can fill it with the things you want.
18. Soften. Instead of being on edge, soften your heart.
The universe knows when you are resistant to opening yourself up to the world around you.
Even if you’ve been hurt or betrayed, lower the walls you’ve built around yourself.
Allow loving-kindness meditations and vibrations to soften your heart.
If your soul is pitch-black, envision a bright and loving light from within.
If your heart region feels like a rock, imagine water gushing away at the rock. Imagine that the person who loves you the most lives there.
Allow anger and spite to melt away under the potent power of love.
The most important thing you can do to soften your heart is to love yourself. I’ve written an entire manifesto to help you do just this. To download your free copy, visit here.
19. Embrace your bliss. Do what makes you happy. Seek happiness like a firefly charmed by light.
Seek and experience continuous moments of joy in your day-to-day life.
Surround yourself with experiences and people that enrich your soul.
Seek and be in a continuous state of bliss, joy and delight.
This alone will bring you every wish and desire you want. What you’re doing here is raising your vibrations by feeling good. And feeling good is the ultimate secret to manifesting your every wish.
I’ve written an extensive article on how to feel good – all tips you can use in your daily living.
Feeling good is a real miracle – it will really magnetize your heart’s desires, and your wishes and dreams will show up at record speed.
If you do nothing else in life after reading this post, do this: spend your time consciously doing activities that make you feel joyous. Forget about desires or what you want. Just repeatedly engage in activities that make you feel good.
Of course, as a caveat, don’t take this advice literally. Gambling, drinking, drugs and taking too many selfies of yourself could have negative consequences on your life.
Feel good, but make sure you’re not harming yourself in the process.
20. Wait. Allow the universe to deliver what you’ve requested on its terms, not on your rigid timelines.
Be patient while the universe does its work.
No need to be pushy with the universe’s timeline. And no need to throw your hands up in despair and give up altogether.
If it’s meant to be, it will happen.
If the universe in its wisdom doesn’t believe something is right for you, it may delay the opportunity or withhold it altogether.
Universal wisdom reminds us that patience is always a virtue.
And remember, if you’re not manifesting what you want, what could you be doing wrong? Re-read through this post and see how you can live more in terms with universal principles.
21. Acknowledge the miracles.
Miracles are everywhere (Singapore's St. Andrewss Cathedral)
Sometimes, you do all these things and your every desire comes true. But while you’re vacationing in the Black Forest in Germany or the tulip fields in the Netherlands with your irresistible dream guy, you may have forgotten what got you there.
You forget the universe. Forget above love. Forget about giving. Forget about how we’re all connected. Forget about feeling good. And forget how you achieved all your dreams in the first place.
When something good happens in your life, acknowledge it.
Say it out loud, “What a miracle!”
“What a synchronicity!” “I’m thrilled this happened!” “My wildest dreams came true!”
“Thank you universe. We are creating the most magical possibilities together.”
Be aware that the universal laws are in play. Be happy that you understand them, respect them and are applying them in your life.
#22 Bonus Law: Show Up. Just when I thought I had a complete list of all the universal laws, I was chatting about universal principles with my friend, Janet Brent. She reminded me of one powerful universal law I had left out. Along the lines of being present, you also have to SHOW UP.
In order to maximize the universe working in your favor, you have to make an effort to be there. You have be ready for what the universe has in store for you and be willing to receive it.
You also have to show up for the things that matter in your life, the things that you value and the things that you love.
When you show up for work you’re passionate about, clients your care about and the things you value in life, you create more connections and opportunities for yourself.
Be at the places your heart calls you to. Show up for your passions, dreams, values and people who matter to you. Be willing to receive what’s in store for you.
Remember, these laws are to help you be more in sync with the universe, but that doesn’t mean you should stop living your life altogether and not take any action. That is far from reality.
The universe wants you to be in motion and to make progress in your life, but it also appreciates right action and energy. Energy that is conscious, loving, giving, sharing, patient and grateful. Energy that is uplifting, filled with high vibrations, and cares about others.
To have the universe work in your favor, work these 21 laws (+1 bonus law) into your life. As you become more attuned to the universe, be prepared to be wowed by the miracles that unfold in your life.
If you enjoyed reading this message and found it helpful, please share this message via Facebook, Twitter or email with others you think will benefit. Thank you.
Yes, I’m spending the summer in Malaysia and Singapore – traveling, writing and hitting up the local hot spots. And by that, I mean some local churches, temples and shrines. A little bit like the church hopping I recommended once.
I did mention my travel plans, right?
If you didn’t hear about it from me, you’re probably not on my mailing list. That’s where I share additional insights and tell you what I’m up to. Some of the people who read this blog, tell me that the funniest stuff comes out on email.
If you’re not the mailing list, sign up on the right hand side of the blog, under the Get Enlightened section. You’ll only get information designed to help you live a more purposeful and meaningful life.
Anyway, I wanted to share with you some of the travel photos of my favorite sanctuaries in the area for your next travel adventure or vacation. Enjoy!
One of the first places I visited here was St. Andrews Cathedral in Singapore. It’s the country’s largest cathedral and celebrated it’s 150th anniversary in 2006. The breath-taking architecture makes this a wonderful place to check out.
In Penang, a must see is Nattukotai Chettiar Thendayuthapani Temple which celebrates the Hindu God, Murugan. While you can visit this temple any time of the year, it is most prominent during the Thaipusam festival held in January or February every year.
Another spot to check out in the state of Penang is the oldest Angelican church in Southeast Asia, St. George’s Church. The church was built in 1816 and has had several restorations since that time. Malaysia has declared this church a national treasure and and this church plays an important role in Penang’s history and heritage.
Finally, the Wat Chaiya Mangkalaram Buddhist temple is awesome! The third largest sleeping Buddha statue in the world can be found in this temple. In addition to the sleeping Buddha, you’ll find many beautiful statutes and artwork throughout this colorful Buddhist temple.
Well, that’s it for now. I hope to keep writing and updating you while traveling. Again, get updates only subscribers receive by signing up on the top right hand corner of the page.
I never thought I’d hear those words coming out of anyone’s mouth. Let alone hers.
“I wish I’d killed you when you were born.”
Her disdain echoed in my head. It was like we’d moved from the living room of my mother’s house to a valley deep in New Zealand, and she’d just screamed the words out loud. Her voice bounced off every surrounding surface. Startled birds screeched and flew away in the distance.
Anyone who’s ever watched a Bollywood movie knows exactly what I mean. (Walking along the street one minute, dancing in a field in Sweden the next, right?).
What are you thinking after reading what she said to me?
That those words from my mother were unacceptable?
That a parent should never say anything like that to their child? That I should have walked out and never spoken to her again?
Or are you thinking – your mother has her own story, Raz. Her own struggles. And those words? Are a result of both of those things.
They’re less about you, and more about her.
If you’re thinking the latter, you’re practicing forgiveness. Just as I’ve learned. From Vishnu himself, no less.
But this post isn’t about forgiveness.
It’s about pushing boundaries.
Because pushing boundaries not only makes you grow, it changes the entire social environment for the next generation.
When people witness you taking steps to move your life away from the norm, they’re encouraged to do the same themselves. It’s how new communities are built.
And that’s a movement that’s starting. Today.
My generation of women – born in the West, to families who migrated from the East -, are experiencing an awakening. It’s happening one woman at a time. With small actions, andmajor show stopping ones.
They’re looking back at their childhood, when they were told that they weren’t good enough to compete with the boys, and realising that they are. Only it isn’t a competition. It’s expansion through unity.
They’re replaying those messages that conditioned them to believe that they were only bound for a life of marriage and children, and they’re redefining it in their psyche.
They’ve learned that they’re bound for whatever they choose to be. Not what their social circle expects of them.
They’re witness to the limitations of their communities, finding ways of challenging the standard, and making tiny changes. It’s creating its own butterfly effect.
And the same is happening within me.
Because when I heard those words from my mother, I decided to uproot my entire life. And I started something new.
I stopped thinking what if I:
Moved out of my home town
Moved into the capital city
Made new friends and turned my hand to a new life
And the thing I started? Is thinking why not?
Why not:
See the stagnation in my current life and build something new?
Live in the city I’d admired from afar for so long?
Get out of my comfort zone and into new circles?
And so it began. An adventure. An EatPrayLovin’ exploration. And my very own awakening.
Because when you stop dreaming of what if…, and start living why not? Your entire life begins to slowly shift. And it moves you to the direction that was previously possible in your mind alone.
And the most beautiful thing? Is that it can begin with very small movements.
My small movements took me all the way from the North of England to luscious Paris.
Where are yours going to take you?
Changing your thought patterns like this can raise a preposterous amount of resistance (I’m English. Using words like ‘preposterous’ is mandatory). And there’s a hellova lot that you can do about it:
Know that it’s temporary because it’s in your control. Resistance is a result of fear. And fear in your mind can be changed. Read this gem and learn the best way to do it.
And what’s more? It’s a chemical reaction in your body. Did you know that when positive change happens, your body starts to receive Seratonin, the feel-good chemical? But because your body was previously content with receiving Cortisol, the stress hormone, it starts to resist it.
Wanting more of what it’s accustomed to (Cortisol), your body decides to tell you to give up, only start and not finish, or tell you that you’re failing. All this leads you to abandon the change, and give up.
DON’T LISTEN TO IT.
Carry on down the path you started. Feed your body with feel-good Seratonin. Because that’s what it’ll eventually start being accustomed to. Y’see folks? Science.
Resolve to see your bigger picture. What experiences do you want in your life, and how do you want to feel? Take time to flesh this out and write it down. This itself will drip-feed the drive you need to start with limited hesitation.
Once it’s written, read it whenever you feel resistance. It’ll be your personal cheerleader. And who doesn’t need one of those?
And the final thing to do is to simply start small. Baby up those steps. Because Practice makes persistence. And persistence makes you unstoppable.
Today may not be the day you quit your job to do nothing but retire to the Himalayas and monk-out ‘til eternity. The job you have took investment. So perhaps today you simply book yourself onto a meditation retreat, and build from there.
And so it starts. The movement that takes your what if.. and makes it an unstoppable why not?
And today? Is your opportunity to share your story with our community here. What times in your life did you decide to challenge yourself and do something different? What change did you create, big or small? When did you turn your what if… into a why not?
And if you’re feeling like sharing some more, join the campaign. We want you on our team. It would be an honour to have you.
Razwana Wahid is the founder of Your Work is Your Life. A copywriting and online business strategy service dedicated to coaches, consultants, healers and service providers. The ‘what if …. why not?’ movement has started. Are you in? Join us. Right here.
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I feel like I’ve had two working lives. And they seem like night and day.
There was a time that I was chained to my phone, email and work. I would literally work around the clock attending to problems that couldn’t wait another second and the next unfolding crisis.
My life was tied to the news of the day.
The next political attack.
The next political move by an opponent.
“She said, he said” politics.
Twitter bickering and Facebook wars.
That was my life working in electoral politics, helping candidates get elected to office.
Always on the go. 24/7.
Furiously climbing the mountain, but where are we going?
I thought staying active and productive was the best way to live a rich life.
Your dreams came true more quickly when you worked harder.
The more quickly and intensely your pursued your goals, the more quickly you climbed the mountain—the mountain to wealth, success, power and prestige!
No, no one really stops and asks why we’re climbing the mountain in the first place. Or how we even ended up on that mountain.
But you look around and see others climbing that mountain of success with a furious intensity.
The happiness at the mountaintop comes with money, power, social mobility, financial and material success.
Right!
Right??
Hello?
Fast forward to slowing down.
Why just eat breakfast when you can eat breakfast and get caught up on all the political news at the same time?
Why just drive to work when you could talk to clients and managers on speakerphone while you’re on the road?
Why just wait in line to buy groceries when you could also answer an email or ten?
I was doing all of this and more in my own my career at one point.
In my desire to get “there,” I forgot where I was going or why I wanted to get there in the first place. And I was completely missing the point on my way there.
After life threw me into the washing machine of life for a prolonged spin cycle, I began to become more conscious of what I was doing.
When you lose everything (okay, a relationship, but it sure did like losing everything), you hit rock bottom.
And when you’re there, you can do one of three things:
Gallivant in sorrow, drinking yourself into a drunken stupor, living a life on the edge, marinating in loneliness, sadness and pain.
Continue doing what you’ve been doing – living the fast-paced and mindless life in pursuit of things that really don’t make you happy.
Or start evaluating everything that you’re doing in your life. Reprioritize. And slow the heck down.
I had a choice to continue living mindlessly or to begin to live consciously.
You get the point: when life breaks you down, chops you up and grinds you to a halt, you wake up to realize you have choices. A lot of them.
To start over.
To think things through.
To consciously decide how you want to spend your life.
So now, instead of racing through life like a cheetah in search of my evening meal, I gently graze like a goat on the country grass as I take in the sights and sounds.
A leisurely breakfast at home. Heck, even working from home.
A morning walk. A silent meditation. Listening to the birds chirping outside my window. Watching the sun rise. Watching it set.
Are you overbooking your life?
In Arianna Huffington’s new book, Thrive, she observes how we try to shave a few seconds off our daily routine, in hopes that we can create enough space to schedule yet another meeting or appointment that will help us climb the mountain of success.
“Like airlines, we overbook ourselves…We fear that if we don’t cram as much as possible into our day, we might miss out on something fabulous, important, special, or career advancing. But there are no rollover minutes in life. We don’t get to keep all that time we ‘save’. It’s a very costly way to live,” she observes.
Are you mindlessly overbooking your life because you are trying to be overly productive or keep up with your high-performing celebrity wannabe White House-crashing socially mobile neighbors?
Or are you going to fight back against what Huffington calls “hurry sickness”?
Why should you slow down in a world of Twitter, Snapchat and Kimye-style televised weddings?
I’m going to show you below how slowing down your life is the real secret to untapped wealth and abundance. And even a few steps on how to do it!
When you slow down and enjoy life, soaking up the small moments, you will find the meaning and fulfillment you’re looking for.
Here are just some of the reasons to hit the pause button and travel in slow motion: To be one with the now.
You seem to be working for a day that may never come. Running, packing, racing, speeding…to what? For what?
This is the very moment that you and I know for sure exists. Yesterday is a story that can be forgotten, and tomorrow isn’t a guarantee.
Slow down so you can be present and in the moment.
Embrace and value experiences.
Enjoy the experiences that you have daily. Instead of simply surviving your work day, tolerating your social life and hustling to survive another day with the kids, find meaning and fulfillment in each day and experience.
Slowing down allows you to taste and feel the joy of everyday experiences, the taste of that oolong tea and the company of your bestie.
To celebrate everyday happiness.
Waiting for happiness for tomorrow? I was.
A message from happiness to you: don’t wait on me, girl.
Happiness doesn’t come from your life partner showing up tomorrow, landing your dream job at Mindvalley or Zappos, or your life falling into place as you desire it.
Happiness comes from within you. Here. Now. Per your request. Your soul’s desire. Your heart’s choice.
Finding happiness in the small moments and everyday moments is the real secret to a happy life.
Connection and relationships.
When you slow it down, you have time for the people in your life. You can simply sit and be present with them. Enjoy their company and their presence.
When you don’t have to go anywhere or rush to the next thing, you can simply enjoy the people in your life.
Soul time.
When you slow down, there is time for seeking within. You can reconnect with your spiritual nature and water your soul. When your external world slows down, you have time to visit and sit with yourself.
Within is where all the answers you’re looking for can be found.
Growth time.
When you race through life without stopping, you don’t have much time to reflect and grow as a person.
You don’t have time for personal development, self-improvement and character building. You have no time to learn life’s lessons because you’re always off to the next thing.
Slowing down allows you reflect, observe and grow as a person.
And when you take all these factors into account, you have the makings of a very rich and rewarding life.
A life that slows down gives you the treasure of time, which permits connection, relationships, inner-awareness, growth, character-building, and more.
Your inner peace, stress-less lifestyle, and uncountable moments of pleasure are things that money absolutely can’t buy.
10 ways to take off your running shoes and slow it down.
1. Set the intention to live a slower life.
Nothing is more important than this. If you’re operating on auto-pilot in life, you enjoy cruising at 100 miles per hour.
You’re dashing through life with an Olympic torch in your hand so you can enter the stadium to pick up your medal. Unfortunately, you’ll be dead tired when you get there, and you’ll find that the medal ceremony only lasts for 5 minutes.
And you would have missed the sights and scenes on your way to victory.
If you want to slow things down, set the intention to slow it down. Commit to yourself that you’re going to spend less time living an overcommitted life, less time in your car in traffic, and less time doing things you can’t stand.
Say yes to simplifying, reducing commitments, and living more slowly.
2. Know yourself better so you can reprioritize your life.
If you don’t know what you want, you’re going to be pulled in many different directions without much focus.
Identifying and acknowledging what’s important to you – family, passion, fun, adventure, creativity, spirituality, service or other values – is your first step to self-understanding.
Once you acknowledge that yes, these 2 or 3 things are what make for a fulfilling life, then you can create a life that’s based around those things.
You can start doing more of those things that are in alignment with what’s important to you in life and shut the doors on all those other things that are wasting your time and energy.
Understanding your values system is a great way to begin to reprioritize your life, and life coach Tim Brownson has an entire book dedicated to this topic alone.
Understanding your values allows you to live a life that’s more in line with who you are while reducing frivolous commitments.
3. Carve out blocks of “do-nothing” time.
Are you one of those people who has every minute of their day on their calendar? Wonderful.
Please put the gun down and step away from your calendar.
Your productivity and efficiency has gotten you far in life, but has it really?
Could slowing down and resting turbo-charge your productivity and your output?
Purposefully add blocks of time into your calendar, during the work day if possible, where you’re doing nothing constructive. Take this time to do nothing or do something leisurely: walking, a nap, or simply sitting and taking in the day.
If you can’t calendar in blocks of “do-nothing” time into your day, then try to find moments where you squeeze in some “do-nothing” time. Try a longer lunch, a more leisurely walk to your next meeting, or some breathing exercises on your next work conference call.
4. Plan a little.
Similar to creating blocks of time where you do nothing, one way to slow things down and take life at a slower pace is a little daily or weekly planning.
You have to know what’s on your plate so you can identify what’s important to you and what’s not.
Once you realize what’s important to you and squash those things that terrorize you and eat up your time, then create a plan that allows you to do what you have to do in the amount of time you have.
If you plan ahead, you can reduce the rushing, the anxiety and the mindless “busyness” of life. A little pre-planning reminds you how much time you have to do the work that’s in front of you.
If it’s overwhelming, then get help, push some things off to the following week, say “no” to some of what’s on your plate and get a little more breathing room.
7 minutes of planning can reduce 7 days of reckless living.
Simple – plan a little, breathe a little easier.
5. Stop overbooking yourself.
If you were a hotel, would you be the sold-out New York Four Seasons Hotel?
Social gatherings, family gatherings, kids’ events, pet reunions, Burning Man festivals, the asparagus festival, the Cannes film festival. Enough already.
You may feel the desire to be seen. To be seen is to be admired, you might mistakenly believe.
You’re wrong.
People who are dashing around from the party scene to the nightclub scene to the charity dinner scene for the sole purpose of being noticed are living an illusionary dream.
If you’re simply showing up for your own vanity and ego, first get over yourself.
Then start saying “no” like Solange’s flying kicks to brother-in-law Jay-Z: quickly, furiously and with purpose (but in a loving “we’re still family at the end of the day” kind of way).
“More and more scientific studies speak to the irrefutable benefits of sleep,” Arianna Huffington writes in Thrive.
“A study published in Science even calculated that for the sleep-deprived, an extra hour of sleep can do more for their daily happiness than a $60,000 raise,” Huffington shares.
When you’re rushing through life sleep-deprived, you’re harming your body and your ability to be most productive.
Set earlier bed times and give yourself the luxury of waking up without an alarm clock. Wake up when you’re rested. Read more tips here on getting better sleep.
7. Set limits on technology.
Are you hooked to your cell phone, iPad, laptop and other accessories?
24 hours a day?
Turn off all devices at a certain time. Disconnect.
As Huffington suggests in Thrive, shut your electronic equipment off and keep it in a different room.
“Disconnecting from the digital world will help you reconnect to your wisdom, intuition, and creativity,” she writes.
I’ve started doing this of late and am surprised at how much more peaceful and less worried I am. I don’t worry about who’s emailed me, who’s texting me at midnight or tweeting at me.
Get the technology out of your room and shut it off before you go to bed.
8. Take as much time as it takes to do something.
In a rush and tumble world, it’s all about speed and efficiency. What’s the quickest way to get the job done?
As an experiment, why not give yourself the liberty to take as much time as you need to do a task?
And do only that one task at a time. Cut out multi-tasking and opt for a single-minded approach to the task at hand.
Pour yourself a cup of tea.
Eat your breakfast focused on the taste and texture of the food you’re chewing on. Cut out emails and skimming the news headlines as you devour your Cheerios.
Enjoy the process—slow down and find satisfaction in doing the task by itself.
9. Don’t waste your time, like you wouldn’t waste your money.
Would you go around giving people hundreds of dollar bills for no reason?
Do you toss bags of money from your Jetta’s window (if you do, please text me your address ASAP)?
We don’t frivolously shell out the Benjamins mindlessly, so why waste a chunk of your time?
What if your time was like your money?
Would it easier for you to be more protective of your time?
Could you say “no” more?
I understand that the point of this article is to encourage you to have more time and not live in time scarcity, but this point asks you to be mindful of and careful with the time you do have.
What do you really want to do with your time? Treasure your decisions and choices based on what’s important to you.
10. Stay focused on your own life.
It’s very easy to start going every which way when you’re trying to march in someone else’s parade.
Just because EVERYONE you know is doing the same thing, pursuing the same things and living the same life, that doesn’t mean you have to.
Your friend getting a Masters doesn’t mean you need to get your application in too. Your friend going to law school shouldn’t inspire you, but remind you to get them psychological help.
Your friend nailing her dream job at the top-four consulting firm shouldn’t make you feel like you’re slacking in life and you need to get out of your comfortable career.
It’s so easy to see what people are doing and want to duplicate their dreams. You start running around frantically trying to live their lives, driving yourself to your wit’s end.
Ask yourself if you really want something before you do it. See how it fits with your life, your dreams and your values.
Go from within. Don’t let outside pressures or people dictate how to live. March to your own beat.
When your life slows down, you will have peace and happiness that’s priceless. You’ll also have the focus and productivity to pursue those things that YOU really want in life.
Living in alignment with your priorities and your values will produce a feeling of immense joy, abundance and happiness that no dollar amount or job could give you.
Now go brew yourself a cup of tea and call it a day, mate. Time to turn off the iPhone, enjoy a little “do-nothing” time and get to bed early for a full night’s rest.
* Photo Credit daran_kandasamy
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And before you start writing me hate mail or challenging me to a duel to the death, take a long and deep breath.
I am not, I repeat, not going to talk to you about the law of attraction.
Well…not completely, anyway (I ducked below my desk just in case you picked up your laptop).
I am going to talk to you about a law that appears to be working in my life.
It’s a simple principle that Melody Fletcher of Deliberate Receiving introduced to me and one I’ve implemented in my life over the past couple of years.
No, I wouldn’t say I’ve achieved ALL of my dreams and desires.
I’ve not met that striking woman who’s a blend of Kate Middleton’s grace, Freida Pinto’s beauty, Eva Longoria’s conviction, and Julieta Venegas’s vocal chords.
I’m not living in my dream beach house in Monterey, California, writing novels while glancing outside my window to take in the startling sights of the Pacific Ocean for inspiration. Yet.
While none of these fancy desires have come true, I feel like the law is working very strongly in my life.
For example, I’ve attracted YOU – you’re reading this post, along with thousands of others coming to this blog monthly.
I’ve achieved my dream job and received an unexpected pay raise while doing work where I am able to profoundly improve people’s lives every day.
I’ve attracted beauty, joy, happiness, and peace that have come into my life like a strong ocean wave washing over a sandy beach.
Wonderful people, unanticipated and exciting experiences, travel and adventure are frequent visitors into my life.
Okay already…
What’s the secret to this universal principle and dream-creating law turning your desires into reality?
Feeling good.
Seriously?
Yup.
Just cultivating feel-good, pleasurable, positive emotional states of being.
Buzzing on a juicy vibrational current.
Like how you feel after a cocktail hour, minus the 12 martinis.
How does this law work?
Here’s what I’ve noticed happening in my own life.
I actively seek out situations that allow me to feel good: enjoyable experiences, empathetic people and work that is in alignment with my soul.
The better I feel and the more positive emotions and vibrations flow through my body, the more positive things manifest in my life.
It feels like positive energy is attracted to joyful energy. If you’re emitting a highly upbeat vibration out to the world, you’re going to attract similar vibrations in your life – excitement, fulfillment, success and abundance!
What you desire appears easily and effortlessly.
If you’re emitting low-level vibrations, on the other hand, you’ll attract criticism, heartbreak, failure and lack.
The feel-good law: You will attract what you’re feeling and emitting to the world around you. Your internal state will magnetize either positive or negative circumstances.
Here are 4 ways to feel good, take your vibrations up a notch and encourage the universe to deliver your heart’s desires:
Create a feel-good life
When you create a life that feels good, you actively pursue emotionally feel-good activities. You consciously create experiences and actively infuse your day with all the things that give you a natural buzz.
Again, the same feeling you have after 3 glasses of your favorite chardonnay, minus the hangover.
Whatever you fervently enjoy doing, do more of that. Create time to do it. Feeling good costs nothing unless you have an expensive De Beers diamonds or Saks Fifth Avenue habit!
A leisurely afternoon walk on your favorite beach, a picnic overlooking the Santa Monica pier, a free concert in Golden Gate Park, a tour through an inspiring art gallery, or simply capturing photos of beautiful landscapes around you are a few ways to boost your vibrational account. 2. Create feel-good work.
Fill your days with what makes you feel good, especially while at work, since your work life consumes such a big part of your day.
If your career’s in the dumps or your colleagues are back-stabbing, money-hungry suck-ups, become aware of how they make you feel. If co-workers stifle your happiness, look for a way out of your job. A boss from hell should inspire you to get the hell out.
If you’re a lawyer, dentist, stock-broker, debt collector or tax collector, QUIT your job.
If the work you’re doing doesn’t serve you, it’s time to look for other jobs and opportunities. Less soul-crushing and more soul-enriching work.
3. More Self-Care Please.
Create delicious experiences that help you feel inspired, relaxed, joyful and happy.
Schedule in that yoga class, acupuncture appointment, spa retreat, massage, reiki session, or life coaching session.
Call your shrink, your therapist, your psychiatrist, your astrologer and your personal tarot-maven for clarity and insight.
Indulge in exercise, nutrition and those nutritious green juices Farnoosh Brock whips up for a healthy shot of self-care.
Meditate.
4. Surround yourself with the right people.
Surround yourself with people who make your soul sing. For me, it’s been a couple of my friends whom I’ve known for the past 20 years of my life and my two ever-amusing tiny nephews.
Visit friends you enjoy spending time with, people who make you laugh, supportive friends who have your back.
Who makes you gush with excitement? Whose simple presence makes you feel alive? Identify those people and bring them more regularly into your life. Create time and be open to more opportunities with them.
Your primary relationships matter most. If the people who are most in your life, spouses or significant others, do not help you feel joy and comfort, think about how you can reprioritize, rearrange or eject some of these folks outta your life.
Once you create more experiences and interact with more people who make you feel good, you will start noticing the most amazing things happening in your life.
You will find yourself in a state of absolute bliss and joy. And once you do, you will attract similar experiences and people into your life, people and experiences on similar vibrational levels.
How do you turn this law into a reality? What are practical steps to feel good?
Write up a feel-good list.
There are two kinds of lists to be made. You can write up a list at the end of the day of all the things that made you feel good. Simply observe and acknowledge what’s going on in your life that makes you feel good.
The other kind of feel-good list is used as a planning list. Plan activities, events and feel-good time. Write down those activities and practices that really make you feel like a million bucks.
When you identify those activities that really make you light up, calendar them in.
Calendar in feel-good time.
You’re busy. You’re always busy. So, how do you prioritize feel-good time? By scheduling it, of course. Make sure that a half hour or more of your day is “you” time – and feel-good time!
Use that time each day to do something that relaxes, re-energizes or fuels you.
Treat this time as a sacred and required part of your day. Spend more time during weekends and holidays focused on feeling good.
Be open to any and all experiences that come your way.
Once you start feeling good, you will start drawing rich and exciting experiences into your life: fab parties, introductions to interesting people and invitations to do things you’ve never thought of before.
Don’t resist internally or externally – be open to the experiences that unfold in your life.
Say “yes” to them more often.
Create strong and firm boundaries.
This is one of the most important principles of the feel-good law.
To put it simply, refuse to do things that don’t make you feel good.
Be strong, be vigilant, be uncompromising and ruthless about the people and circumstances in your life.
If your mother-in-law makes you want to get run over by a train because of her criticism and complaints, guess who you shouldn’t spend your holidays with?
If your boss is a screaming tyrant who should star in a sitcom about bad bosses, guess who needs to change or leave their job situation?
If you’re bullied into going somewhere, doing some activity or being in the company of people who get on your nerves, put your heels down.
Make an excuse. Find a way out. Say “no”.
Again, ruthless. And uncompromising.
SCREW OBLIGATION. SAY “NO” firmly and with conviction.
Boundaries can be an act of love and kindness also. Kate Swoboda shares some tips on how to create them.
Guard your happiness and your positive vibrations like the Secret Service protects the President or the Vatican protects the Pope.
No crazy people or deranged lunatics are welcome anywhere near you without getting tazered by a stunt gun.
Be thankful.
Thank the universe regularly for those things in your life that make you feel good.
As the law starts to work and your desires become a reality because you’re emitting a high emotional frequency, acknowledge what’s happening in your life and know that it’s a result of your feel-good lifestyle.
Acknowledge the miracles that unfold.
Be thankful for all the positive experiences and dreams that unfold in your life.
Go feel good!
Your emotions and personal vibes determine how you show up in the world.
And the emotional frequency you’re emitting will bring more of that into your life.
Happiness, peace and joy will attract more of the same.
Drama, irritation and annoyance will do the same.
Be strong in protecting your happy place. Guard your surroundings, circumstances, social circles and family interactions.
Go forth in the world and create more feel-good experiences. You’ll draw more magical circumstances, loving people and unimaginable success.
While I’ve closed the comments on the blog, drop by Twitter or Google+ and let me know how you feel about this feel-good law. Do you create feel-good experiences daily? Or think I’ve fallen off the deep end (again)?
I help people overcome their devastating breakups and divorces and find love again. Instead of visiting the Himalayas, sign up below and join me. I am taking a writing break but will be back soon.
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